Friendship.

Just been really grateful for the friends in my life. More on this later.

something random?

I was baptized 8 years ago today.

Memories

Many thoughts came into my mind when I went back to my old church today for my friend's wedding. I left that church 8 years ago due to some untold circumstances and I never went back to visit or even step foot in the church building since the day I decided to leave. I had no regrets because 1. I wasn't growing spiritually 2. I didn't really have a friend since they were mostly boys and everyone have been attending that church since they were a baby so I was always left out and had no spiritual support. And the fact that they are all from Brampton and I from Mississauga really distant our friendship 3. everyone had their own little cliques. I tried blending into the older crowd (3-5 years older), but they rejected me because again, I wasn't BORN into the church. I was out of their league. plain and simple. When I left that church, one of the concerns I had was that people looking down on me and my family. To no surprise, some people did. They said I was wrong for leaving the church. But what's the point of staying in the church if I am NOT spiritually growing? If they cared for me, they would advise me to leave. Anyway, their rejection towards me and family really caused us some tension to our friendships. We lost a few friends, but at the same time, gained new ones at the new church.

Despite the entire ordeal, there were 2 brothers whom I still talk to in this present day, never discriminated me in any way and I really appreciate them for caring for me. These brothers will always have a special in my heart because they accepted me for who I am when no one else did.

So today when I entered the church building for the very first time in 8 years, my heart could not stop pounding. There was just a rushing of thoughts going through my mind knowing that people would stare at me (& my family). But as soon as I stepped out of the car, a friend (whom I hardly talk to when I was still at the church) came towards us and warmly greeted us. He even gave me a friendly hug and a warm smile. Then as I walked to the sanctuary, many people greeted us and I could tell that they genuinely welcomed us back. There were many people whom I hardly talked to even while I was still there came up to my brother and I and asked us about our lives and what we've been up to. Weird but good. Things just happened to be completely opposite to what I was expecting. People STILL remembered our names. To be frank, I am no one special. I never served on the worship team. I was never in the popular crowd. But most importantly, I wasn't born into the church. I didn't grow up with these people. But many of them still remembered our names. I definitely shed a few tears while I was in the sanctuary, not because of the bride and groom, but because I felt a sense of warmth - like I haven't been home in a veryvery long time.

Another thing that touched my heart was seeing the people there all grown up. The babies are now elementary schoolers, middle schoolers are now university kids, university kids are now married and have kids. People in my parents' generation are older, wiser and have grandchildren. But the oldest of all, the English Pastor, is still the same. haha. Things like these make me realize that everyone is moving forward, for better or for worse, and that we should not look back or dwell on current situations. There is no time. But rather, we need to look forward to the things to come. With that said, I am SO happy that my friend got married today Who would've thought he would find a girl and get married on this day 8 years ago. 8 years ago, he had no degree, no job, no money....and definitely no girl ;) But today, he got everything. I can't wait until it is my turn to get married! I wonder what's going to be like...

After my August 8th Exam:

I've really been studying hard for this exam. I am currently at the point where I can't study anymore, but can't have fun yet because that might ruin my "study" mood. I am afraid that if I have too much fun before the exam, everything that I've learned will slip out of my head and I won't know anything for the exam. Impossible and absurb, I know, But that's just how I am. Besides, I can't really ENJOY my time of fun when I know that I'll be writing my exam soon.

So lately I've just been compiling a list of things to do once I am done with my exam and before I go to Vancouver.

- Greek lunch with my mother

- baking baking baking!!! (I have like 10 recipes that I want to try)

- cook!! (I have like 10 recipes that I want to try & not everything is Korea)

- Go to Koreatown for some snakes and lattes!! (I haven't played boardgames in SUCH A LONG TIME!!!)

- dinner/chillage with my lovely friends!!!!!!! (Thank you for waiting!!)

- norabang/karaoke!!

- eat buffets!!!

- find new bakeries in the GTA (I am currently in LOVE with bakeries. This item needs a separate post)

- SHOPPING!!!!! (even though homie E thinks I shop WAYY too much. But I am a girl so it is essential)

- SKYPE DATE with steph!

- food crawl....kensington market? chinatown? little italy?

- VANCOUVER + BANFF!!!

Waste...?

You know what's sad? Finding out that your education, or more specifically, your four years of undergrad and your Masters DON'T MEAN ANYTHING TO ANYONE.

Today I received an email saying that my undergrad marks were not competitive enough to be accepted into the SLP program. So is there even a point in trying again next year? my marks will still be the same. not competitive enough. So what does this mean? I will NEVER get in to SLP? looks and sounds like it. So does this mean that I've just wasted 6 years of my life....doing NOTHING? guess so.

I am really lacking direction here. I really don't know what I SHOULD be doing. Father God, please guide me.....

Court

I don't think I will ever forget this day.

Remember how a car rear ended me last year (a couple days after my birthday) in Scarborough? And remember how that guy wouldn't give me his driving license because his license was suspended? Well, apparently the police pressed charges on him because the guy was no where to be found. The police one night called me asking for his whereabouts and I definitely had no idea. Who actually keeps in touch with the person who rear-ended you after all damages have been fixed? Well, the police explained everything to me and asked me some stuff. A month later, I received court orders stating that I needed to be present as a witness.

Now, here's the exciting part. I have actually been in the court room before - way back when I took grade 11 law. But I had never actually been INVOLVED in a case where I had to go to court for. The entire experience was exciting, but nerve wrecking. It was kinda like in the movies. Prior to the proceedings, the police office called me out of the room to talk about the case. And then shortly conducting all the standard procedures in the court room, the prosecutor presented my case and asked me to stand up and walk to the witness stand. Yes, I had to swear/affirm.The prosecutor kept asking me questions and I just answered. The judge listened and responded. And then it was followed by the police's statements.

What was interesting was that the defendant (the guy) was nowhere to be found. It definitely would have been more exciting if he was there, cuz at least I could see how interpreters do things in court. Nonetheless, it was fun and exciting. It was definitely an eye-opener!

It's been awhile

There's just SO much going on in my life right now....been so busy! so much that my parents think I need to chill out and find just a day to relax.

It seems like I have no time for anything.....or more like.. there's always time for something....

EM retreat this long weekend. Please pray for safety, revival and relationships. I pray that my friendship/relationship with the sisters whom I will be rooming with will strengthen.

talk to you all later.