Bad week

This week was just bad because of this one exam that I wrote this morning - anal chem.

Exam:
I have been studying like crazy for this exam because I really didn't want to fail it. And no matter how much time they give me, I will never feel ready for this exam. Despite all the failures in the past with this course, I was quite determined to really work hard for the exam and anything else related. God's been really rebuking me alot lately; just disciplining me about a lot of stuff and I know I deserve them all. I have been disobedient and just being unfaithful and I know his disciplines are trying to teach me something. Just like how parents teach their kids. We need to fall down to learn how to pick ourselves up again.. and that's what's God been doing to me. We need to face hardships in order to learn to be a better person. This anal chem course isn't really a hard course but the questions on tests/assignments are just very hard to understand making me feel really scared for my final grade.

Anyway, I got pretty sick of studying for this course on wednesday and thursday and just wanted to get it done with.

Last night when I finished another round of lecture readings, I was still feeling very anxious, tired and just didn't know whether I knew my stuff well enough cuz the prof could ask anything. So I just started to praypraypray and just really asked God to give me peace and confidence throughout the exam tmr. Leaving it all up to His hands... and just letting Him use me and my brain.

This morning when I woke up at 8:00am for my 9am exam, I felt very peaceful (despite some thing else which I will explain later). As I start writing the exam... I knew most of the stuff from T/F and fill in the blanks and one math problem... but there one was theory question and one numerical question that I was struggling with. And together, they were worth 30 marks. I didn't know what to do but stare at the paper and people around the room. I saw Mo looking around the room, touching his bald head (hehe)...and then I saw Mulder on my left just didn't know what to do with some of the questions. At one point of the exam, I just wanted to leave because I had no idea what to do with those two questions. I thought about giving up.

I sat in there for 1.5 hours staring at the question... and I knew that God would somehow help me through this... and then....by just one click, God told me how to do this math problem. At first, I was still skeptical about it because I have never seen it in the problem set, but God really just told me how to do. What He told me made a lot of sense to me soo I just went with it cuz as long as I write something down, I still get part marks. So after doing that math problem... I felt quite confident but at the same time... uneasy as to whether I did it right. But I know I shouldn't worry because God was the one that did it for me.

After I handed in my exam, I went to the washroom with Hina since she also handed in the exam. We were just discussing about the exam and stuff and she told me that she did the exact same thing as me for the math problems. The same thing what God told me write down. She is a smart cookie, and if she did the same thing, I know I did it right too....

God has really blessed me today. His presence in the exam room and the peace that I felt this morning were just indescribable. It is as if He said, "My child, just trust me on this one"

Impossibles can turn into possibles with God alone.